ICYMI, I haven’t written in a month.
I thought I would have 73928 ideas for blog posts after taking a month off, but I honestly still don’t really know what to write about. I don’t even know what this post is going to be about.. I just started typing.
May was a month full of work and spending lots of time with my amazing boyfriend. I usually create monthly goals to push myself. I love always feeling like I’m working toward something. And time goes by so fast… I like looking back at my month and being able to say, “I did this, this, this, and this.” But last month I just focused on working hard at my job and then chilling hard afterward.
Now that it’s June, I’m going to make some more goals, but honestly having such a demanding job takes away my need to create a bunch of monthly goals. When I wasn’t challenged at my previous job, I felt like I had to do so many fulfilling things outside of work since I wasn’t feeling accomplished. Now I bust my ass 50 hours a week and am completely content not doing anything else.
Last summer Abigail and I went to a lotttt of concerts. Like two in one week sometimes. It was a blast. And that’s when we grew super close. My planner was basically my concert organizer. Now I just want to chill. Going to concerts sounds like an expensive night of anxiety. Crowds of people? I’ll take a good movie and being around a small amount of humans instead.
I’ve already turned down a few various opportunities for the summer because I don’t want to be busy. I always get so pumped for summer and then it ends up being the busiest time of the year and soon it’s August and I’ve gone to the pool once.
Honestly I think I used to enjoy being busy because it would distract me from my depression. Now that I don’t have those thoughts/feelings anymore, I’m okay with doing nothing. I feel like I have value when I’m just sitting on the couch doing nothing, and that’s something I haven’t been able say for years.
Even though work and Netflix occupied most of my waking hours in May, I did do some other enjoyable things:
I VISITED A HOMELESS CAMP
WHAT I LEARNED: never give up on hope, homelessness is a choice for some people, don’t feel sorry for yourself, constantly better yourself and your situation, these people can’t even go to the doctor, homeless people have very strong relationships with each other
I SPENT A LOT OF TIME WITH FAMILY
WHAT I LEARNED: I’m lucky A F to have such a close, loving family. And I want to have my own little awesome family some day …. 🙂
I WENT TO CLEVELAND
WHAT I LEARNED: I love visiting friends, my boyfriend is fun to travel with, I’m still very lactose intolerant, time off from work is soooooo necessary